Am I ordering bread or am I on the floor of the NY Stock Exchange?

You enter Panera.  You are excited for the sandwich with a side of bread that you are about to devour…then all hell breaks loose.

Am I on the right line?  Am I on the bakery line?  Am I making myself a coffee?  Where do I order?  Why is the font so small on the menu?  Why are people shouting?  This is crazy!

Nothing encourages binge carb eating like stress and anxiety.  Coincidence that ordering at Panera causes both???

Panera knew this was a problem three years ago…but its still a problem today! http://www.businessinsider.com/panera-bread-ceos-strategy-2014-4

panera-menu-prices

What the hell is up with this menu?   I want the “you pick 2.”  What does that encompass?  The font is illegible unless you are 3 feet away, but the sea of people trying to figure out what line they are on along with trying to figure out if they are getting a half a soup with a whole sandwich or a half sandwich with a whole soup are standing in your way.  Maybe I’ll make a coffee since I think I am on that line anyway!

Why are there so many numbers with each item?  Why does every sandwich have turkey or asiago or aioli on it?  What is up with the dots legend?  Its no wonder Panera’s workers are always pissed off (https://twitter.com/paneraprobzz)  but how the hell could we know what to order when this is what we are facing???

I eat at McDonalds, over 100 items no problem.  I eat a Subway…1000’s of combinations, easy to order.  I eat at Panera, 11 sandwiches, 3 soups, about 5 salads and have no idea what to get.  I liken ordering at Panera to trying to trade stocks on the floor of the NY Stock Exchange:

“I’ll have the You Pick Two with turkey, extra asiago, no aioli, and hmmmmm I guess a side of bread. Wait I get soup too? I want a whole sandwich. Oh I’m sorry I didn’t realize this was the bakery line. Oh it’s not, wait is it my turn to order? Am I getting a half or a whole sandwich? Do I pick up the food here? Oh you mean I pick it up over there where the big dude waiting for his bread is breathing all over the counter? Awesome, where are the drinks? Oh about 250 feet away, great, let me trek through the recycling center and dining room to try to decide if I want soda or hibiscus tea with fruit fly covered lemons in a condensing clear cup.”

Just writing this has my temperature rising.  I could go for some Asiago in a bread bowl right about now.   

Unknown's avatar

Author: Tommy Fabey

Just a new principal sharing my ideas to help others like me

2 thoughts on “Am I ordering bread or am I on the floor of the NY Stock Exchange?”

  1. What a scam…somehow half a sandwich and a ladle full of soup that gets reheated from a frozen sack is 18 dollars….and why does each half a sandwich/panini have to come in its own box with a preview screen? Why not just wrap it in paper like every other sandwich place on earth…maybe it would only cost 16 bucks then!!!!
    To me the line/ordering process is more like a hotel…Do I already have a reservation, am I a preferred member? Why are those people standing over there, do they know something I don’t? Oh wait, I want a specialty coffee drink, do I pay first, or watch you make it and huff and puff for 6 minutes then pay? Is someone going to bring it to the worlds talles counter and call it out by item but not name?

    Like

    Reply

Leave a comment